When I am asked "what makes you happy?" I think of Peter Pan.... Think happy thoughts so you can fly. So in those moments that I take the time to think about what makes me happy, it is like a video playing back in my head and I feel like I can fly. I can achieve anything I want and put myself right back into those memories.
I live for those moments where I can sit back and replay all those happy thoughts, where my smile was so infectious that anyone and everyone around me couldn't help but smile as well. Those are still the times that bring out the best in me, in these days that everyone seems to think that I may not smile or laugh enough. They are forgetting to ask me or talk about the one thing that without a doubt I will smile about. Like today as I was standing outside in front of a Starbucks on my phone when a gentleman walked by after reading the back of my shit the reads "True Love" and asked me "Does he still love you?" In that short instant that man has no idea of the smile he ignited with in my when I answered "Yes" then whispered to myself " yes he still does."
Just that simple of a thought fills me with a smile from head to toe. Just thinking of the simple memories like being chased around the house till I was pinned down so he could write "I heart you always" down my arm with permanent marker. Or the time I caught him singing to Back Street Boy's song in the car. I cant help but laugh and smile at these thoughts. Or the time that he asked me why I was crying when he told me he loved me. He just didn't understand why something that made me so happy that I cried. Partly it was because he just hated to hear me cry period. But that is another favorite memory that always brings back that smile that everyone so longs to see.
So here is where I want to tell everyone that tells me that they want to seem me smile and laugh like I used to. Take the time to think and remember what is the one thing that you can remember that would make me smile till my cheeks hurt. The memories may bring tears but they are tears of joy and happiness that warms my heart every time I think of them. Then you will see the old me and the smile you so desperately wish to see every time you look at me. It may not want to be something you want to talk about, but remember its something that helps the person who is still learning how to live life in a new way
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